i wish it was next week so i could have my car. the past few nights i've dreamt about it actually, which may or may not be pathetic but i love the little machine. and of course me being the closet interior designer (not interior designer of closets) the biggest thing on my mind is what bumper stickers to get and what to hang from the mirror....haha i'm pathetic. but i found a nifty site thru a link in one of Sam's away messages and i think i might order a couple stickers from there, i'm just in love with the one that says "history shows again and again how nature points out the folly of man" (a Blue Oyster Cult quote, from one of the greatest songs ever written: Godzilla) so i might put my new checkbook (thats right, i have one of those now and also my very own debit card should be arriving in the mail quite soon) to use and order that and a couple pins, i'm tempted to get the "nature is pissed" t shirt too. but yeah.....

so Greg and i unlocked i think the rest of the worlds in Kingdom Hearts and holy shit Halloween Town is cool, but i don't know how the fuck i'm gonna beat Oogie Boogie, its just like the part in the movie with the torture chamber with the casino wheel thingy and choppy blades and explosive dice and gun robots....its insane. i havent even been to the Hundred Acre Wood yet but apparently you have to go back to Traverse Town and enter it thru Merlin's book (how cool is Merlin, letting you use his furniture as target practice for your magic spells)....i'm alienating the majority, if not all, of the readers here so i'll stop, but if you have a chance to play this game take it, its actually crazy mad fun. and i wish i didn't have to wait till the day after tomorrow to start the Hundred Acre Wood, but i have to go to bed soon since i work early and then i'm going to Zack's. ah well.

and for the record, i work with some of the dumbest cunts ever. EVER.

trying to decide whether or not to do an hour of tae bo before bed...yes it is quarter of two in the morning and i have to get up by ten to go see about insurance for my car (put a deposit down on that silver Prizm, sweet little car, i love it but i can't officially have it till next week after the funds get transferred) but i don't want to go to bed, i'm exhausted in just about every sense of the word but too pissed off to care, you may or may not know why. yeah, still in a bad mood. on top of it, when i do get sleep, i don't get anough of it because lately theres always been something i have to go do and i can't just sleep the whole day. plus the shitty obnoxious dreams....i mean, last night i dreamt i was on a fucking lesbian cruise and i HATED IT. all the lesbians just annoyed me. i probly wouldn't make a very good lesbian, i'd do a lot of sleeping around because its hard for me to find girls i can stand. well anyway, i just don't want to sleep. i don't know what i want to do. once again sick of my life and totally devoid of motivation for anything except getting to the next world in Kingdom Hearts, and my patience with that is already wearing thin (just bought today but played it for a total of about 6-7 hours, beat Wonderland but hate Tarzan's jungle and can't beat Cerberus so can't do anything else....pissed off that Hundred Acre Wood is last, but happy that Halloween Town is next). really don't have the energy for that tae bo thing but might force myself to do it anyway, haven't worked out in a few days (don't remember how many, who fucking cares when every day is this dull and depressing).

don't try to drag me out of this by saying "lets hang out" because then i'll have to make an excuse to not hang out, and i don't want to have to do that again. i'm sick of people, i had to see people for almost a whole week straight and it was too much. once a month is fine for me, thanks. people wear me out too much. (this excludes Katey because i almost never get to see her and we can never do enough catching up.)

however, if you'd like to sit there patiently while i silently sob and bitch about the same things over and over, youre more than welcome to IM me anytime. i'm not looking for input, just want to vent to the wrong people.

i still dont want to work out because i know i dont have the energy and it sucks anyway.

this is gonna be one of those weeks where i hold back tears on the way to my insanely fucking shitty job, cry in the dishroom, scream obscenities when i get home and then spend the rest of the day curled up in bed hating everything. havent had one of those in a while....and its not pms this time either, woohoo!

no cheer up comments allowed or i will hate you forever.

so tomorrow morning i'm calling Lee Auto in Saco to arrange for them to bring the zx2 to me on Thursday so i can check it out, things look pretty good so far. my dad looked it up on something akin to Carfax and apparently its been sitting there on the lot since about April, so hopefully nothing is horribly wrong with it, tho from the report it sounds clean. so yeah, that'll be awesome. plus on Thursday Zack is taking out the lease on the apartment. i haven't even seen it but who cares, its extremely cheap for Portland, its got a view of the water, its right near the park....nothing not to like that i know of. i've got no idea when we're moving but i figure after i get the car it doesn't matter since i can drive here for work until i get a job in Portland. guh, want car now. :(

me and Zack watched Piglet's Big Movie today, it was all right i guess, despite whoever that obnoxious woman singing all the songs was, she sucked ass, and there were several little scenes that out of context looked like there was serious gay action going on (i'm not even trying to be perverted, it was obvious just watching it). inconsistencies with the original books were rampant (which is usually no big deal, except they were showing flashbacks to the first few stories, before Tigger came to the woods, but Tigger was there anyway) and it just looked like Disney didn't even try. the Search for Christopher Robin is a way better movie.

well, the zx2 went down a thousand today, so i really want to get out to Saco and check it out. my dad is all like "welllll.....its 2 door so insurance will be more expensive." i'm like "dad, its RED, so insurance will be more expensive." and he's like "i don't know about that...." i've actually never heard that 2 doors are more expensive but i know red cars are. but who cares, its now $2000 cheaper than the other one, and still sooooo much nicer.

tomorrow i'm going to Portland with Gabe after work and i'll stop by some potential places of employment, once again if anyone's go any ideas/tips/connections/whatever please hook me up, cuz this'll be my first full time job (unless i end up taking 2 part times, which i really dont want to do unless they're both in the mall or something, or both kickass, or at least one is kickass....you get the idea).

ugh, my brother is paying Timesplitters AGAIN and theres this tinkly music and its driving me insane, so i'm playing tATu over and over to drown it out. i'm supposed to be vacuuming up the sugar i spilled all over the kitchen making cookies but meh, i'll do it eventually...tho i do have to work in a little over an hour and still need a shower before then. ugh. i cant wait till i get my car and can start looking for a job in Portland. speaking of which, Zack has found an apartment, which i know almost nothing about but the guy is willing to rent it to him and its less than $700 a month so its all good as far as i'm concerned. if anyone's got any suggestions for kickass places to work in Portland let me know, i'm gonna try Newbury's, the various thrift shops scattered about, some of the places in the Exchange Street region, Bullmoose, some places in the mall like Hot Topic (i know, sell out, but i could look however the fuck i wanted and they'd think it was great, plus discount shit for everyone!!), Spencer's, Ben & Jerry's...uh thats probly it for the mall, but whatever....so yeah, anywhere you guys think i'd enjoy working full time (gasp!), let me know, i still hardly know the city.

so i'm reconsidering the tattoo idea, if i got one i'd still get Piglet, but i'm also considering getting a couple little rings in my left nostril, as that would look cute. since i'm hesitant about both i probly shouldn't get either, but i do want both, i think i'm just reconsidering because i like piercings, i love my new lobe piercing even if no one else notices it. but it will probly depend on where i end up working, then again most of the places i'd consider like their employees to look like freaks so i'm probly all set.

tomorrow or the day after or something my dad said we can check out the selection of vehicles in Saco, and if i don't find anything better (and its still available) i'm going for that zx2, its a nice fucking car and a thousand less than my favorite local car, a cute little silver Prizm...so yeah, carness. hooray.

hoorj, my brother finally stopped playing that game and now he's watching Princess Mononoke, for like the sixth time since he borrowed it from his friend last week, but whatever, it could definitely be worse.

a note to fellow vegetarians (or those of you who just enjoy a good veggie burger now and then): if you get the Morningstar burgers, the ones that are actually supposed to be like burgers, just eat them plain with a little maple syrup, they have sausage-esque spices in them and taste awesome with the syrup.

MY PARENTS ARE LETTING ME BUY A CAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOHOO!!!!!!!!!

not much else is up, i've been unusually social lately and not minding it a bit so if anyone is interested in seeing me i'm down wit dat, give me a call or IM me or something sometime. i'm kinda booked thru at least Wednesday tho, but any time after that is negotiable. :P so weird to have plans with people....

also, if anyone knows where i can get the laser in my stereo fixed/replaced for cheapish, i'd be grateful, i'm thinking of selling it but since the CD player obviously doesn't work i'd want to fix it first, however it'll probly cost more to fix than i could get for it. so what i end up finding out about laser replacement costs will determine whether i sell it. or hell, if anyone wants it and is willing to fix it themselves, or trade it for something cool if i fix it, thats awesome too. theres not realy anything i need tho, but make an offer if you care. (yeah right anna, everyone who reads this obviously has a better sound system than the shitty old one in your room, you're desperate.)